Doing our taxes this year and, man, that pencil is really digging in. It’s getting harder to put the numbers down and not think about where our money is going to go. Images of Tomahawk cruise missiles double-tapping schools and speedboats are tough to shake.
Don’t know about you but we feel caught between worlds. One is hyper-fast and responsive to local news of the day while the other is mired in super slo-mo, like that old vaudeville routine with the comic pantomiming the efforts of a panicked hunter trying to stay ahead of a wounded but vengeful lion.
Don’t get us wrong, we don’t mind paying our fair share but sheeze, man, sending off our hard-earned scratch while bombarded by Jeff Bezos’s prompts to buy Melania’s $40million fashion commercial seems remarkably disconnected even for a class of people capable of renting Venice for a wedding reception. We nearly snapped a metacarpal pummeling the DISLIKE downward thumb when “READY TO WATCH?” came up on Amazon Prime.
All of this filthy rich chutzpah is setting our inner Irish Rebel on fire, our little brains harking back to the words of Alexis de Tocqueville while videos of Kai navigating the aisles at Erewhon with her security detail swirl across social media, kaleidoscope and start to chafe. Still, we guess Kai might need a defibrillator after shelling out $300 for a branded Erewhon hoodie.
With our inner war piper droning and aux barricades sounding the rallying cry, we can’t help but wonder how long American patience will hold before “1776” is replaced with “1789” and the masses storm Mar a Lago in search of the botox-enhanced bourgeoisie.
Perhaps history will not repeat itself. You never know, we have been told a wide swath of our country’s population can’t walk and chew gum at the same time and actually voted for what they’re getting now. We’ll just have to wait and see.
