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The Sunday Somnambulist


Katy: It must have been some party.
Boon: Unbelievable. A new low. I’m so ashamed.

Animal House

Almost at the end of our week and surveying the damage – which has been substantial, we’re afraid. We have noted signs of tension up and down the 24/680, like the sudden appearance of sand cones or fumaroles before a seismic event, those giant tectonic plates sliding and rubbing up against each other until one gives way and… whammo, things begin to topple.

Sometimes, it seems as if we’re sleepwalking through all this, deep in a subconscious state and traipsing untouched through a maelstrom of colliding events and conditions, pointing to the cows, trucks and locomotives as they go sailing past. The whole thing is almost too much to comprehend, until you wake up the next morning and see where everything landed.

We noted with concern this week that the attention of our readership appeared to be elsewhere and we scratched our heads over that – taking it as another sign not unlike the receding ocean waves prior to the tsunami – until we realized folks had left us to watch  things unfold as they unfolded on Capitol Hill this week. And that’s totally cool. We like you informed.

But then we had an actual tsunami in Indonesia, those plates grinding harder and harder until there was a good sized political earthquake at home and the promise of a quickie FBI probe in Washington D.C., a local resignation in Lafayette touched off another seismic swarm and conversation about affordable housing, whilst the Local Romans took to their wine and idols and apparently tried to drink their troubles away.

Saturday night parties in Moraga and San Ramon seemed to reflect the buildup of tension, with shots (no, actual gunfire) reported at one and the Moraga contingent making Boon, the kid from Animal House, proud of their work. We always think of the poor scut who gets to clean up all the after-party detritus, however, because we’d bet dollars to doughnuts the ones who made the mess are home sleeping it off while Our Hero is on hands and knees scrubbing down the walls and floors. We’d toast you, Unsung One, but you probably don’t want anything more to do with alcohol…

Speaking of politics – and we know, many of you are tired of this topic right now – but on a somewhat lighter note it appears lawn sign theft remains a popular political sport these days, with cheesed off candidates and campaign managers reporting widespread pilferage. NEWS24/680 repeats its standing offer of a ball cap and maybe even a Latte Card for any video showing the Midnight Scamperers at play, since everyone in the world appears to have a surveillance system in place these days and we’d just love to see who is behind making all these signs go desaparecido.

And then we began to lose local people this week, not to the pyroclastic cloud of an extinction-level event but folks we knew and, in some cases, loved as the Great Croupier In The Sky looked down upon us and said: “Time’s Up.”

Our condolences to all affected as we mourn those we’ve lost.

A new week looms. We’ll just have to wait and see what it brings.



    • Not all signs are stolen for “political purposes.” Kids (pranks), for another purpose (needing a sign for garage sale, etc.) lawn care professionals (trying to do their job) homeowners that didn’t give permission (especially homeowners on a corner lot).

      • I’m pretty sure the majority of them are stolen for political purposes these days. Whatever the reason it should be considered election tampering by today’s standards which I was actually poking fun at.

        • Unless we catch them in the act (or on camera) we have no idea. Political yard signs are more allegiance to a candidate (or proposition) for the homeowner, not tell the neighbors driving by. Voters inform themselves by research. All “sign stealing” I’ve witnessed were kids. They couldn’t care less because they don’t vote.

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